#15

I made a discovery today. I found the core of me. I didn't like what I found. Don't get me wrong here. There is nothing nasty or evil!! It is me, with everything stripped back and the skeleton of my personality exposed for me to look at. The skeleton is flawed.
I cannot write here of what I found. I'm still waiting to come to terms with it myself.
So much is now explainable of what course my life path has taken and what cause created the seed which produced a flaw in the skeletal infrastructure.
I now know who I am. It hurts me and it releases me in equal measure.
It came about through a Hyper episode which lasted for about an hour. My hope is that I can grab hold of that which releases me and begin anew.
This will have to be discussed in depth with J.
It is so important and I need careful guidance.
It does not explain my Manic Depression, but it does explain me.
It does not explain my arthritic spine.
It does not explain my BCC.
It does not explain my possible Sleep Apnoea.
But it does explain me.
Know thyself? How many of us can answer that question.
I feel a bit like I did when I was diagnosed with Bipolar. There is a sense of relief. What it is, isn't pretty, but I now know what it is.
I must discuss this with J.